Goodbye Summer Hello Only One Child

This probably goes without saying but I like to stay busy.  My version of busy is probably different than others.  I figure you may have guessed that from the fact that I kept having kids after baby #2.  So the fact that in a month I will have 3 in school 5 days a week and one year left with one last child not in school is terrifying. 

I am actually dreading school starting.  Yea yea I know, for all of you who just rolled your eyes I know, I know!  However this is the stage in life that I am equally anticipating and scared to death of.  What am I going to do with only one child at home!  Next year will be even worse because Ryan will be in preschool and I am ALONE!  I remember quite well how excited I was when Conner and Noah both were in preschool and for a short time I was alone until Evan was born a few months later.  I couldn't wait to go to the grocery store alone and catch up on my DVR'd shows with no interruption but that was over 5 years ago and boy has life changed since then.

You see my version of hard had changed.  When you are a mom of 2 that's all you know and you can't imagine how to juggle 4 because you've never experienced it.  I tell moms this all of the time when they say "I can't imagine how you do it!  I can barely handle 2!"  Girlfriend, I was there once too, your version of hard just changes.  So going from 4 to 1 is intensely scary for me.  There is too much free time and not enough to keep me busy.  Sure I can clean with only one child coming behind me to destroy what I just did.  Only one child to hear demands from, one to take to the store, one to feed lunch and snacks to, ONE!

All to soon one will be none and they will all grow up way to quickly and leave me.  I look forward to seeing them grow up into men and I don't want time to speed up.  I know that my days will be filled with more sports, more activities, more friends at the house, and more to do than I can ever imagine but for now, this point in life scares me.  I keep wondering what I will fill my days with because to be honest some days during the summer with 4 kids at home and friends from the neighborhood hanging out, I still find myself bored for lack of a better word.  I miss coaching, working at my moms store, and having another title than just mom but that time in my life has passed and while one day in the future it may come around again for now it's just me being mom to 4 wonderful boys who will be heading off to school shortly and maybe, just maybe I can find happiness in knowing Ryan and I will hold down the fort and get quality time, just the 2 of us.

For now I will enjoy the last few weeks of summer making memories with all 4 of them. 

Korean Skin Care Routine - What is it all about??? PART 1

Let's just get this out if the way, I've been gone, I have no other excuse except kids...

You know 4 boys, they take up all of my brain power and I've neglected this blog yet again buy I have a new found desire to talk.  Basically I tend to get a focus on something and then research the heck out of it.  When I was having babies I researched EVERYTHING!!!  Like everything!  So where did the topic of skin care come up you ask?

Well, I am now turning 33 at the end of the month.  I could care less about age, I am not scared of getting older, bring it on!  Except suddenly I look in the mirror and I see new lines and dryness that I never saw before.  So my first thought was my makeup needed a rejuvenation.  I tried everything for aging skin and got no where.  So I took a step back and looked at the bigger picture.  My make up wasn't the issue my skin was and sadly I had taken that for granted.  I had pretty good skin my entire life to which I thank genetics.  I rarely washed my face and left make up on very often.  I never really wore much make up except concealer to hide my dark circles but as I got older I wore more and more concealer that just got gross and made my wrinkles look that much worse.

So I invested in eye cream, face wash, and eye cream.  Then started the research!  Ladies and gentlemen months and months of research!  Come to find out, Americans are incredible hard on their skin and rely on surgical methods or both instead of taking care of it early on.  The French and Asians take a totally different approach.

Are you still with me??   I hope so because this is where it gets good.  We are doing it wrong!!!  We are raising generation after generation of women who want an easy solution but also want to bask in the sun.  Hey, I include myself in that!!  I wanted the sun kissed glow and still wanted youthful looking skin and then when I got older I was looking for a miracle cure to turn back the time but sadly folks, such as life, it doesn't work that way.

Looking for more info??  Are you truly interesting in helping turn back time??  Let's go to part 2!!

Korean Skin Care Part 2

Pinterest - The Devil or Best Invention EVER!?

Who isn't on Pinterest?  For that matter can you pronounce this wonderfully insane website??

It is addicting, there are meme's everywhere depicting how addicted we women are.  So how do you use it?  Are you pinning things just for fun?  Are you a craft enthusiast and make the things you pin?  Do you love food and pin all kinds of yummy things only to order pizza?  You could be a combinations of these or you use Pinterest for totally different reasons but in my case I am all of these things and more.

I started with a love of food.  I pinned so may Yummy Appetizers that I created a whole new board for it!  Then I moved onto Yummy Dinners because of course my family needs to eat dinner and what better way to find a good meal idea than Pinterest! 

And then I was hooked!

I was pinning everything from pictures, to dream vacation spots, desserts, clothes, funny things, you name it I will pin it if it's something I find awesome.  So a little while back I realized I was making my meal plans from Pinterest on a weekly basis so I created a board for my Weekly Menu Planning.  I have tried so many of these recipes that I pin the next step is to create a board that shares which recipes I have tried and enjoyed.

After awhile I realized I was gaining quite a lot of followers with is addicting let me tell you!  I am constantly pinning and editing my boards to make sure my Pinterest boards are interesting.  Why do I do all of this?  Well, there are millions upon millions of pins!  You could get sucked in for days!  However it has really helped me get organized with my weekly menu.  It has opened a world of food that I would have never found.  We are trying food from across the world which is so fun and interesting for the boys.

I have always been into crafts and DIY things for my house which as you probably know if you know anything about Pinterest those types of things are in abundance on Pinterest.

How do you use Pinterest?  Let me know in the comments and feel free to follow my pins!

If you are a blogger, small business owner, or just interesting in learning more about how to gain followers on Pinterest, send me an email and I would love to help!

 

The Reason We Drink

Have you ever had one of those days.  You know the one, where everything seems to be screaming "YOU'ARE FAILING!"??  Yea, you know the ones I am talking about.  The days when the baby has explosive diapers, he doesn't take a nap, and proceeds to cry all day long.  The days when you wake up and know its going to be a good day only to find a toilet overflowing, the light bulb is out in the kitchen, the dog pooped on the carpet and a certain 1 year old is playing in it....

I could go on but you get the point.  It's in those days that I just pray for 6 o'clock when my husband walks through the door and I can spend 5 blissful moments sipping a glass of wine while I peacefully cook dinner.  Did you get that, 5 minutes....

After those 5 minutes, the dog needs to go out, kids need mom for everything, and my husband has disappeared.  While there is nothing better than being a mom it is truly the most exhausting job you will ever have.  You cook, clean, make sure homework is done, change diapers, and worry every step of the way if you are screwing up.  No matter how together you are, we all have those days. 

This is why we drink.  Not because we are all raging alcoholics but because by the time evening rolls around we need just a small pick me up to get us to the next day. 

Wine, you beautiful thing you!

Do we actually "need" the wine?  No, but it's not really a need.  It's a want, it's one thing that is ours, not the kids!  Every time one of my boys asks me what I'm drinking, I always respond with "It's wine and is only for mommy" because lets face it, we share EVERYTHING with our children.  I cannot pee alone, or shower, dress, clean, cry, eat chocolate.  The list is endless. 

I love my kids, they are a blessing but mommy needs her wine.

 

Summer 2015 - In Pictures

Instead of writing a long post on what we did this summer I'll just keep it interesting and keep it easy.  So this summer told in pictures!

Mourning The Loss - Being the Queen

I love my boys.

The dirty, messy, no frills, not much drama, booger eating, mud slinging, sports playing boys.  I love all of that.  The title of my blog says it all, it allows me to be the one and only Queen of this house but there are days, days like today, that that statement makes me sad. 

I find myself getting sad that the house is always dirty with mud, pee, grass, or leaves that the boys have brought in, spilled, or couldn't aim.  Seriously how do they get pee all over the toilet!!! 

When it comes to my shop, I can't help but makes girlie things and it doesn't help since I have one niece and she probably doesn't want all of my hand made stuff.  Even if she did, it's hard not being able to see her in it right away, dress her all of the time, or just see the excitement on her face and it's also not the same since she isn't mine but beyond that, I want that connection between my husband and his daughter. 

I will never be the mother of the bride and plan a wedding with my daughter.  I will never be able to hold her hand while she gives birth or go shopping together and listen to her talk about guys.  I will never hold her while she cries over her first heart break.  I will never fight with her over her clothes or teach her to be proud of who she is and never let someone else define her.  I will never have her as my best friend later in life when she calls and thanks me for being the best mom I could because she now has children of her own and understands.

When it comes to sons, they will eventually leave.  They have to and I get that.  They will eventually replace me with a wife of their own and I will no longer be the top woman in their lives.  I'm ok with this, I certainly don't want my mother in law put ahead of me and I know that one day I will have daughter in laws that I maybe close to but it's not the same.  They will have their own mother's.  

So, on days like this, I feel sad and I mourn the loss of a child that I never had and won't have.  I try not to indulge this feeling because I have no regrets and I love all of my boys.  I am beyond blessed to have 4 healthy and crazy kids.  I not only feel sad but then that sadness turns into mommy guilt...  yes, you know who she is... 

However for a short time I let myself mourn her, that sweet little girl that was not meant to be.  Then I laugh at the boys as they roll down the hill laughing while I secretly dread trying to get out the grass stains. 

Planning Long Trips With 4 Kids

If you don't know this already, my husband is originally from Panama.  His grandfather, Aunt, and lots of cousins live there still so we try and get down there once every 2 years.  The first time we went Conner and Noah were 2 and 3.  The second time we added Evan who was a few months away from being 2.  This time we will be traveling as a family of 6!  What were we thinking?!?!

But seriously, it wasn't that hard since I planned way in advance for a multitude of things to keep the kids from going crazy.  This isn't a vacation where we go to a big city and do lots of things.  We fly into Panama City, spend the night in a hotel and then the following day drive 4 hours to Las Tablas which is a small town in the middle of no where.  Dariens grandfather has updated his house but there is little electricity, no AC (it's crazy humid and always around 88) and surrounded by cattle fields.  I don't mean it to sound boring because it's far from that but for kids it can be if we don't plan things.

We are going in June and will be gone for 10 days, I've already been planning and finding flights, rental cars( which is insane in itself), what to pack, etc.  This isn't my first rodeo but not only are we going to Panama but Conner asked to go camping for his birthday, and my wonderful parents scheduled a beach trip for July! 

Is it summer yet?

Everytime I feel overwhelmed, I sit down and work on planning everything. 

Next up, passports renewal for Conner and Noah plus a new passport for Ryan!

I won't be surprised if I end up with a ton of new gray hairs...