Sunday, May 11, 2014

Happy Mother's Day - A letter to my mom

Happy Mothers Day! (A couple days late, whoops!)

I originally thought about this post and wanted to make it about being a mom to my kids but also about my mom but after writing a couple paragraphs I deleted it all and started over.  This happens a lot in the blogging process but there was a very specific reason I stopped and began again.

My mom is the reason I am the mom I am today.

Very simply put, I wouldn't be here without her.

Yes, stating the obvious but more than that I am a mom because of her and from a very young age I knew I wanted to be a mom like her.  Maybe some of it is because I am the oldest of four kids.  I have 3 younger brothers and although I hoped each one was a sister and NOT a brother, I wouldn't trade them for anything.  Well, at least not now but back when they were just coming into my family and disrupting my princess status and I would have traded them for another tiara or a sister or a baby doll! 

My parents divorced when I was 7, my mom and dad had joint custody but we spent most of the time with my mom.  She worked, then she stayed at home but she still worked running a company with my step dad.  I could talk about my childhood for ages but I'll just stick with this, divorce sucks but my mom was always and never ceasing my rock through the years.  Even in high school when I'm pretty sure she wanted to trade me for another son who wasn't so dramatic and emotional, she was there. 

Even when I thought living my life only for my own selfish whims, she was there.
She took me back in when I hit rock bottom.  What mom wouldn't?   Well she certainly didn't have to, I was 21 and was an adult or so I though.   In spite of every insane thing I had done in the year after she made the tough decision to kick me out of the house, she was there.

I'll leave that story for another day...

My mom is my best friend.   I don't like sharing her.  It's probably a good thing I didn't have a sister! I do have 2 sister in laws now so I share her a little more now.  I still want her approval and when I'm sick I still want her to take care of me. 

So for this Mother's day, it's not about me, it's about my mom who helped shape me into the mom I am.

Thank you mom!  Thank you for being there even when I didn't think I wanted you there.  Thank you for never running away even when I'm sure you wanted to because I have those days now which make me even more thankful you didn't escape to Fiji.  (Can we run away to Fiji now though?)

Thank you for always being honest with me even when I may not want to hear it.  I inherited this which is probably why we like to shop together.  :) 
I continue to hope every day that I can be the mom to my own kids that you were to me. 
I love you!